Self to self.

​I can find endless reasons to feel down, depressed, disinterested, without hope.
Confused; emotionally obsessed, paranoid, alone, sad, and broken.
​
Many negative descriptive words of gloom, and doom.
all valid, as part of my life, at this time.
However, I have gratitude, and gratitude is hard to ignore.

Feeling sorry for myself, can only bring about apathy.
A lost ability for action, in any positive form.

Yet, before me awaits opportunities, simple rays of hope.
Why then, turn my back upon myself. allowing, emotions of negativity to reign over me.

I but need to regain a sense of purpose, and value.
rather than living in, a reality of pretence.
This is not the way to live, life has so much to offer.
It is a truth; for to long have I allowed myself to live in the safety of my pretend world.

Yet here I remain, in my negative state of mind for I fear that of; reality, truth, and actuality.
 I find myself without grounding, nor stability; nor vision, nor hope...
...and yet, the deepest essence within me....

words 464

.…longs for that of true being.

However, what if I were to take this moment in time.
What if I were to except, and incorporate into my living world:
that of reality, truth, and actuality.
What if I were to create stability, become grounded,
have vision, making hope, the mantra, throughout each coming day.

A deep inner me believes that the simplest alterations of attitude, could turn my life around.
and that faith, can lead to a stronger conviction of, self-worth, and value.
To have faith.
To be of faith.
To know faith.
To understand the ways of faith.

Yet though begs the question, to have faith in what?
How does one discover from where faith comes?
Is faith already inherent in the basic origin of the self?

What defines me as a human being?

Is it possible for all human desires to be fully sated?
Am I ready to face, the greater unknowns?
Am I prepared for that which awaits me?
Do I have the courage to discover, the essence of, self-discovery,
where thought be of no concern.
The conscious mind, giving way to, the greater subconscious.
where pure originality of being, awaits.
gifting they of perseverance with courage to face, 'the wisdoms of true reality.'

​I began looking into my life.
I questioned myself,
I saw a reality that could be,
I spoke aloud, that I may hear
My words were just words. yet they were words that were to give me 'hope.'

Life becomes life, until it is not…….
​
Is there a true, essential way of things?
is there a greater meaning enveloped deep within...
..or perhaps, Humanity’ simply means.
​
We who have yet to learn.

 

 
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Copyright Paul Charles 2022